eight fears

*EIGHT FEARS*

I know I slacked on my '10 day challenge' but I'm picking back up! Here it is..

1.) Never completely healing from my depression on this earth. This is a very real fear in my life, and I know I'm not supposed to worry, but I am human.. and if you are in my shoes you understand why this is a very legitimate fear for me. However, I fully trust the Lord's plan for my life.. and that's the truth I cling to daily. He makes this life bearable!

2.) Car wrecks. I am terrified at the thought of losing a loved one to a car accident. Losing a loved one at all, for that matter. But when I'm behind the wheel, I am very conscious of those around me. I never want my family to be in the newspaper for this reason. I know too many people that lost their lives behind the wheel, and I can't bear the thought of what those they left behind had to/continue to go through.

3.) Kidnapping. Period. I never let my guard down. I'm never 100% comfortable leaving my son with anyone other than my husband and I, only because I know how much more aware we are of our surroundings (others) than most, and how well we're able to defend ourselves and our son. Yes, I'm a paranoid momma, but you'll never catch my son on the news. Thank you, Marine Corps!

4.) Spiders. I. hate. them. I'm a firm believer that the Lord did not create them. Demons in disguise. They may fool you, but not me. I'm maybe a bit OCD too, I vacuum corners/ceilings/places where those suckers try to make their home more than the average person may.. :) And really when it comes down to it, I just scream until my husband hears where I am, and kills them for me. If he's not home, I'm not comfortable with JUST 'killing' the spider either. I need to crush it, and smear it. I need to make sure there is no possible way it can come back to life. And for those that think it's cute to 'decorate' with spiders for halloween... you're on my list.

5.) Bees. I've never been stung, and I'm honestly not worried about myself either. However, when one comes near Ayden, it's very hard for me to 'sit still and let them be' like you're supposed to. I want to swat and kill! As I'm sure you know, If a little one has an allergic reaction to a bee sting it can kill them, and quickly. I wish I could have an epi pin on hand 'just incase' but it's not possible without a prescription. I don't agree with that, I believe they should be readily available for anyone with children under the age of 10- no prescription needed. My mom works at a doctors office & recently experienced a little boy around the age of 5 who was clinging to life because of a bee sting. He was just eating ice-cream with his parents one second, "OUCH" the next, then his throat was closing moments after. I cannot fathom being so helpless.. this world can be so mean. It's just one of those things you have to trust the Lord has in His hands. This world isn't perfect, and life is so very precious! The little boy DID survive, I'm happy to say, but what a horrible thing to have to go through because of a BEE. So this is why I fear them.

I really don't have any other fears that are worthy of sharing, actually, I can't think of any more at all.. maybe I'm just exhausted from our long day of playing outside! It was perfect weather for little man to enjoy, and enjoy he did! He wants to be outside ALL day now. He's content after waking up from naps for maybe 15 minutes, then he's at the door pounding and fussing until I take him outside! We spent maybe a few hours inside today, tops. But I am so happy he enjoys the outdoors so much- there's nothing like fresh air all day!! Happy baby, happy momma.. :)

Sweet dreams, friends!