Being thankful for every moment.

My son will be 19 months old tomorrow! He is teaching me so much about life every day.. every moment of every day. I'm learning that things like a clean house don't matter. Sounds crazy, right?! Maybe to some, but I see it like this: I'll have forever to do dishes, sweep, mop, do laundry, etc. However, I will not always have this little boy in my home to love on. Yes, he will always be a part of my life.. a HUGE part of my life, but now doesn't last forever.

Life is short, very short. For some of us, too short. I've been blessed with the opportunity to work with a family who knows firsthand how precious every moment is. They have pushed me to accept every single moment as a gift (especially the mother, Erica... she is such an inspiration to me!) I am thankful for the fits that never seem to end, for the tantrums thrown at the worst possible times, for the early mornings, for the messy house, for the moments when I don't think I can fight any longer, for EVERY SINGLE MOMENT.. because I'm alive!!!! Because my son is alive!!! Because my husband is ALIVE!

Because we've been blessed with another day.

Slow down.

Something that's been hitting home for me lately:

I'm guilty of watching the clock, and I'll be the first to admit it. "WHEN is nap time/my next break?!" I know this is destructive and it sets me up, but I also know full well that I'm human and cannot expect myself to not get exhausted from being a mother to an almost 2 year old!!! So I pray for energy, patience, and most of all unconditional love every day.

Just yesterday, a thought that's crossed my mind many times came in again, but with a deeper meaning. Ayden is only under MY loving care for a few more years. Yes, I will always be his mother, and Lord willing our relationship will always be strong, but he'll be 18 before I know it. Legally speaking, that means he's not 'mine' anymore. Bullet straight through my heart.

I have to make these moments count!!

Dishes can wait, who CARES if the house is a wreck! I get so 'busy' with life that I often times forget to slow down and simply enjoy what's right in front of me, my precious son.

I love you so much, Ayden James!

Home is where the heart is.

We've been having so much fun together in our new home it's crazy. The transition has been insanely smooth, so thank you to those that prayed specifically for that on our behalf! Ayden is having the time of his life, and is spending 95% of his days outside because of this BEAUTIFUL weather! He's a little past 18 months now, and I wanted to make a quick list of some of my favorite memories for this month of his life.

Bouncing in my arms (dancing) while I hold him.

Blowing raspberries on my belly, and mouth.

Kissing my boo-boo.

Playing with my bellybutton when he's tired.

Making it his goal to get a crowd laughing.

His love for being barefoot (just like momma).

The way he watches the older boys play across the street.

His genuine concern for how someone's feeling.

His smile, and those big blue eyes.

How he talks- the things he says/ways he says things.

My heart is so full of love, and although this age is difficult in many senses.. I refuse to let the negatives over-shadow the many positives! :)

One .more. week

This is exciting. I mean, REALLY exciting!!!!!!!!!!!

We have officially started our 'one week countdown' to the day that we move into our new HOME! That's right, this time next week, we'll have signed all the final documents & the keys will be in our hands. Wow wow wow..

I just want to take a few moments to thank my parents (Bruce & Vonni) for their unconditional support this past year and a half. I don't even know where to begin in all honesty, they have been so selfless and have given us so much during our stay here. I guess all I can say is that I'm forever grateful to have parents that love me and my family so much! So thank you guys for all of your support, and for sharing your home with us for an extended period of time-we love you!!

Although moving to a new place will be a tad bittersweet, there are a countless number of things we're looking forward to. As we embark on this new journey, I want to send a few prayer requests out to my prayer warriors:

1.) That the transition would be smooth for Ayden, Jaymes, and myself. As of now, Ayden's used to seeing grandma & grandpa every day (even if not for long). That's going to change, and we don't want him to be upset. I'm praying that in his new environment he'll have too much else to focus on! Things will obviously be different for Jaymes & I as well, and we just pray that we'll ease into our new life smoothly!

2.) That we would continue to be motivated to live financially wise. Obviously, moving into a new home costs some money.. living in your parents basement doesn't. Needless to say, things will be a little more tight than we're used to, but we're prepared, and it's ALL worth it!

3.) That we wouldn't have any crazy neighbors, and that we'd be welcomed into a loving neighborhood! From what we could see, we are surrounded by elderly folks. Which is GREAT, that just means peace & quiet.. hopefully! ;)

We will keep everyone updated on home progress as we move in. We plan on posting before & after pictures so that everyone can see from start to finish what we accomplish! Also, we're in need of a few helping hands on Saturday the 10th. We'll be moving our big furniture items on that day, and so far, the friend's we've asked are busy. We plan on providing lunch for those who can help us! Please be in contact with me if you are able to assist! :)

Spending time with God

This is a journal entry I wanted to blog, from last week.

Today I caught myself focusing on how bad I feel when Ayden prefers spending time with someone else. Destructive thought process if I were to dwell on it, however, it brought forth an incredibly valid point in my heart: How does God feel when I prefer spending time with facebook, etc? At the least, 10,000x worse than I feel when my son chooses something over me.

WOW.

So, what do I need to do differently in my life? Obviously something. I so look forward to spending time ALONE when Ayden goes to sleep, that I often get absorbed in pointless things (because they take no effort). Problem with that is, I'm not coming out of those 'breaks' refreshed. There's still something missing, rather, Someone. It is incredibly hard for me to be still, I've used as a coping mechanism 'keeping busy' for the longest time.

I want to set an example for my son, NOW. I want to show him the importance of placing God ahead of ALL earthly things, always. I've decided to force myself every night, before I do ANYTHING else, to spend 30 minutes in silence with my Savior. It's a work in progress, I usually look at my clock a few times to see how long it's been because I'm so anxious to DO something. Some nights I don't even do it. However, I'm praying that this will become so natural for me that I can't not do it. I need someone to keep my accountable!

struggles (vent-post)

My son is 17 months old, and in all honesty.. this is a very difficult age for me. I find myself often just wanting to say, "Seriously Ayden, again?!" I really hate feeling that way.

I hear from the majority of my friends that their children also went through the worst of the 'terrible twos' around this age, so that's comforting! However, usually by the time my husband walks through the door, I am BEYOND. ready. for. his. help!

In this season especially, I can't help but wonder how God feels when we rebel toward Him..

I've been challenged to examine my life and ask myself what things I may be doing/saying/thinking that don't please my Heavenly Father. Guess what, folks? I'm very human. I have a list!

I want to lead my children by example. I don't want to be a hypocrite. I want them to see God's light in me through every season of their life's. And most importantly, I want them to know that they are unconditionally loved by their Heavenly Father, and their parents here on earth!

that's the way to momma's heart..

Ayden is intentionally showing his love for us, like crazy these days!

This morning we were on our way out the door for a playdate, and Ayden was just SO thrilled that we were getting to go somewhere! He was talking up a storm when I told him where we were headed, then he started kissing me over & over & OVER again! I probably got 10 kisses (at least) in less than a minute. I couldn't stop smiling!

This is what I live for, moments like these.